


I love you, you know?

by Thompster



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Car Accidents, Cheating, F/M, Hospital, OQ Angst Fest, Outlawqueen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-25 14:24:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15642579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thompster/pseuds/Thompster
Summary: Robin makes a huge mistake that may cost his soulmate's life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there, here's my contribution for OQ August Angst Fest day one, I included prompts #3 #6 #7 #16 #22 and #39  
> This is my first published OQ story, so please bear with me :)  
> TW: Major character death... I guess?

* * *

 

3:23am, and Robin was still out. This was the third night of the week he'd been staying late at the station and this time, Regina had enough. She trusts Robin, she truly does, but tonight she just had to make sure he was okay. She just  _knew_  something was wrong, which is why she decided to take the car to drive to the station in the dark, ignoring the very low temperature and the snowy road.

She made it to the station but when she arrived, Robin wasn't there. The Sheriff car wasn't there either, so Regina assumed he was patrolling, and decided to drive around town to find him. She needed to be close to him, something wasn't right and she needed him, needed his strong arms to hug her and tell her everything was alright.

Regina drove around for at least 15 minutes when she finally spotted the car on the side of the road, a few feet away from her. Smiling in relief, she started the car again at the green light, completely unaware of the car coming to her right, slipping on the ice in a poor attempt to stop at the red light. All Regina could see and hear was a blinding light, and a female voice calling her name. She couldn't move or open her eyes anymore, all she managed to do was whisper "Robin…" and then suddenly everything was dark.

…

Robin grumbled in her neck at the poundings against the door that wouldn't stop. He removed himself from her, saying, "You should probably get that…"

She sighed and got up, making her way to the door to open it. When she opened it, she was shocked to be welcomed by a huge slap on the cheek and tearful Sheriff.

"WHERE IS HE?" Emma yelled, stepping into the room looking for Robin.

"Wha- who?" She asked, feigning innocence.

"Do NOT try to play that game with me Marian!"

"Emma? What are you doing here, what happened?" Robin asked fearfully, he could hear the tears in Emma's voice from the bedroom.

All he got as an answer was Emma's angry fist on his face. Serves him right.

"What the hell?!"

"Yes, what the HELL indeed Robin! You wanna know what happened? Your wife has been looking for you! You know, your actual wife? Not the ex-one you've been screwing while your soulmate was bleeding out on the road!" Emma shouted in his face and saw Robin face turn as white as a sheet.

"Wait wha-what? Where's Regina?!" Robin was breathing heavily, and his hands started to shake, Emma noticed.

"She's… she's at the hospital, she had a car accident b-but Robin… s-she isn't doing too well…" Emma said in between sobs. Robin put his hands on his mouth and tears started to fall on his cheeks. He'd messed up big time, he didn't think much of it at the time, he never intended to hurt Regina in the process… he just needed to change his mind, to make the guilt go away just for a little while. And this might just have cost his soulmate, his wife's life.

Robin sighed and sniffed, rubbing his eyes to remove the tears that were falling and said, "Take me to her Emma, please."

…

The ride to the hospital was silent, except for a few sniffs from time to time, and Emma briefly explaining what happened to Robin.

When they finally got there after ten long and painful minutes, they both ran out of the car to get to Regina's room. Before they arrived in front of the room, Emma stopped Robin.

"Do not tell her now," was all that Emma told him, before she started to walk again to Regina's room.

Snow and David were in front of the room when they arrived, and quickly updated them. Regina was now stable and awake, although still very weak. Robin breathed out in relief and made his way inside of the room anxiously, seeing his wife for the first time after the accident.

Her eyes were closed, her face was all bruised and there was probably a huge cut on her forehead, hidden by a dressing. She had a mask on her face to help her breathe, and her left arm seemed to be broken.

Robin couldn't help the sob that made its way out of his mouth, he quickly put a hand on his mouth, tears blurring his vision and slowly walked to the bed. Regina turned her head and opened her eyes slowly.

"Robin…?"

Robin swallowed the lump in his throat painfully and sat on the chair next to the bed, taking Regina's hand gently in his own.

"Hey my love," Robin said and laid a soft kiss on the hand he was holding, "how are you feeling?"

"Where the hell were you?" Regina replied, ignoring his question. Robin smiled sadly, there was his Regina.

"I was…"

"You were with  _her_ , weren't you?" She asked looking him in the eyes, and looking for the truth.

"I…" Robin hesitated, he didn't want to break her heart, but he also couldn't lie to her, not anymore, not  _ever_  again. "How do you know?" he sighed.

"You should have been there, I thought I had found you, but when I called your name it wasn't your voice that answered me. When I first opened my eyes it wasn't your face I saw, and when I opened them for the second time, you were still away and Emma had gone to get you," she replied, frowning at him and breathing more heavily.

"Regina I-"

"I thought you  _loved_  me Robin, I thought I could  _trust_  you…" Regina started to get angrier with every second that passed and her heart monitor beeped faster and faster.

"I  _do_  love you Regina, please don't ever doubt that my love I just…" Robin tried to explain but was at loss of words. How do you explain to your wife and soulmate that even though you love her more than anything, you made a mistake that you know could break her forever? "I never meant to hurt you, and I am so,  _so_  sorry for what I did."

Regina's anger started to dissipate, and Robin's heart  _shattered_  on the spot. Regina wasn't angry anymore… oh no, she was sad, she was  _broken_. A few tears made their way down her cheeks, but she couldn't hold the pain in anymore. She was just so tired and so emotionally drained… she removed her hand from Robin's and started to sob uncontrollably. She was shaking and could feel her whole soul being ripped away, her heart breaking in her body.

"I-I trusted you Robin… I s-sold my soul to get y-you back!" Regina sobbed, hiding her face with the hand she had just taken back from Robin. Everything was aching but yet she felt numb. The room was warm but yet she felt cold.

Yes, she sold her soul to get him back, and this is exactly what has been eating him alive for the past two years. The guilt made him sick every day, and he just wanted to forget for a little while, to stop  _feeling_. So he went to Marian, and indeed stopped feelings, and forgot.

Robin didn't know what to do, he was aching to hold her and tell her everything would be okay, that they would work it out, that he loved her more than life itself, that if he could trade places with her right now he would do it in a heartbeat… he broke her, he broke the one thing that he loved more than anything, the woman who make his heart beat every day, the woman he vowed to love and cherish, in sickness and in health, until death do them part.

Against all the voices in his head that told him not to, Robin leaned in and gently, oh so gently held Regina in his arms. Their bodies shook together, she was resisting him but after a few seconds she just let go and fell in his arms, putting her head against his heart, while he put his head against her own, crying for the mistake he could never undo.

Her tears were soaking his shirt and his tears were soaking her hair. He started to rock them slowly not to hurt her, and kissed her head, closing his eyes and whispering apologies he knew could never make up for what he did.

As much as she hated herself for it, Regina felt at peace in his arms, she had been waiting to be just there the whole night, and now she finally was. Her body was not aching so bad anymore, her heart felt lighter and the room got warmer. Regina closed her eyes, sighing against Robin's heart. He was calling her name, she felt herself being moved, and suddenly she wasn't in his arms anymore. She felt cold again and the world was spinning around her.

She could see Robin again, his worried face full of fresh tears and his shaking hands holding her own. Doctors were rushing around her bed, trying to remove Robin but he wasn't letting go of her hand.

Robin continued to hold her hand, the doctors were shouting at him, but he just couldn't let her go, he couldn't.

"I love you Regina, don't you dare die on me now my love, we still have a whole life ahead of us… please I beg of you!" Robin told her as she was closing her eyes for the last time, the line on her heart monitor going flat. He felt like in a dream, everything was happening in slow motion, the doctors pushing him to the side and trying to bring back Regina, in vain. The sounds around him sounded like an echo.

"Time of death, 6:04am," one of the doctors said.

No, it was just a dream, it had to be. Robin sank to the ground, not even flinching when his body collided with the ground, and closed his eyes. He couldn't keep going without Regina, she was his heart, his life, his everything.

He broke her, he didn't even have time to make it right, he  _killed_  her.

His eyes were still closed, he thought he could hear her voice coming from somewhere… was he dying himself? He hoped he was, he couldn't keep going knowing what he did, although he supposed he probably deserved far worse than death.

He heard her voice again, this time louder. She sounded alarmed… oh god, even in death he couldn't just leave her in peace. She called him again, louder and louder, he felt himself move, he was probably going to hell after all.

"Robin?!" still no reaction. "ROBIN!" Regina yelled his name, shaking him strongly.

Robin finally woke up and sat straight, gasping for air and looking around him like a lost child.

"Robin it's okay, shhhhhh Robin please look at me…" Regina said, taking his face in her hands and turning it towards her. "Breathe Robin, slowly… in… out… in… out… yes just like that, keep going."

Robin slowly started to breathe normally again, and looked at Regina as if she would disappear at any moment. Regina smiled softly, and stroke his cheeks gently, telling him, "It was just a dream Robin it's okay… do you wanna talk about it?" she asked him, and she looked so soft, her eyes looked so loving and worried and Robin just lost it and broke into sobs in front of her.

"I'm so sorry…." Robin said tearfully and couldn't even look Regina in the eyes.

"Oh Robin…" Regina didn't question him and took him in her arms, tucking his head under her chin, stroking her hair, and rocking him gently. She let him cry like this for a couple minutes until he calmed down. She felt him move then and he took her face in his hands and kissed her lovingly. He poured all his emotions, and all his love into that kiss and left Regina at a loss of words.

"I love you so much Regina… so so much…" Robin closed his eyes and took her in his arms again.

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Regina asked, pulling away a little to look at him.

Robin shook his head and brought her back to his chest, "I really don't… I just wanna forget about it, and keep holding you for a little while… please?"

"Okay," she answered and put her arms around his middle, holding him close to provide him with as much comfort as she could at the moment. "I love you too you know?"

Robin chuckled at that, shaking his head and holding her tighter against him, "Of course I do love."


	2. A Chance to Heal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regina bumps into Roland at the wrong time, and Roland goes to look for help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again, here's my submission for OQ Angst Fest day 2  
> I used prompts #1, #10 and #47, hope you enjoy!
> 
> TW: self harm

* * *

 

She didn't mean to scare him, she really didn't, but then his little body collided with hers and when she looked at him, his shoulder was covered in blood… her blood. It usually wasn't that bad, the tiny cuts would either stop bleeding on their own, or she would heal them with magic easily.

Tonight though, tonight she had gone too far. Too far for the cuts to heal on their own, and too far to heal herself with magic. So she was walking in the cold corridors of the castle to look for some herbs to tend the cuts, holding her left arm with her right hand, when she bumped into Roland.

"Oh hi Majesty! I'm sorry I wasn't looking," small Roland said with a smile, and Regina melted at the sight. He had his father's dimples, which made him even cuter than he already was… not that she found Robin cute, of course not.

"Hi Sir Roland," Regina replied with a soft smile, she was trying her best not to cringe and the pain in her arm. Her smile faded slowly as she looked at the boy's shoulder.

"Are you hurt? Should I call my Papa? He's very good at healing boo-boos!" Roland said after seeing Regina holding her arm against her middle. When he didn't get an answer, he followed her gaze to his own shoulder and gasped as he saw the blood that had dripped from Regina's arm to his shirt when they bumped into each other.

Roland didn't look all that happy to see her anymore, he looked frightened. Regina's heart dropped when he lifted his eyes to her again and a couple of tears made their way down his cheeks.

"Roland sweetheart I-" Regina started but couldn't finish as Roland turned around and ran away. She sighed, feeling tears threatening to fall from her own eyes. She had managed to frighten the only little friend she had, the only person that made her days at least a tiny bit bearable, and her heart ache less.

She felt ashamed that a child so young had to witness that, she knew he probably didn't understand what had happened to her, but it still made her feel sick. She turned around as well and walked back to her chamber, faster this time, to lock herself in and probably never get out again.

…

Roland didn't cry much, the last time he had cried was probably months ago when he broke his arm falling off a tree, so when Robin saw him running to him with a face full of tears, he panicked.

"Papa!"

"Roland my boy, what happened? Are you hurt?" Robin asked as he caught him in his arms. Roland shook his head and sniffed while Robin was checking for any injury. His heart skipped a beat when he looked at his red shoulder.

"Is that blood? Roland what happened, I need you to tell me my boy," Robin kissed his brow and waited for an explanation.

Roland caught his breath, and finally said, "It's the Queen papa! She's hurt and I told her you were great at healing boo-boos but then she didn't answer and I saw the red and I got scared. You have to save her Papa!"

Robin's face turned white, he looked at Will, silently asking him to look after Roland and when he nodded, he took a last look at Roland, telling him, "thank you my boy," and ran to the Queen's chamber.

He made a quick stop to the kitchen, trying to find the herbs he knew he would probably need, and finally headed to her chambers. He arrived in front of the big wooden door and knocked, just in case. He didn't get an answer and when he knocked against the door and was welcomed by silence once again, he tried to open the door, in vain.

Regina sighed sitting on her bed, people couldn't get a clue these days could they? She never wanted to be bothered, but tonight she wasn't even in a state to open the door to anyone. She had been trying to heal her arms for the last ten minutes, but all she managed to do was slightly close the wound, but not enough to make it stop bleeding completely.

"Regina?"

_Robin._  Oh god, everyone but him, she couldn't see him right now. She'd scared his little boy and he was probably there to tell her not to approach Roland ever again. She could hear him try to open the door, but it was locked.

What Regina didn't think about, was that a lock had never stopped Robin before. She snapped her head towards the door when she heard a click, and sure enough, the door was opening.

"What do you think you're doing?!" Regina snapped, looking at him as he approached her bed and looked at her arm.

"Oh thank god I thought you were bleeding out. It was quite the scare you gave my boy your majesty, and even myself until now."

"I know, don't worry I will not approach him again," Regina said, looking at her hands.

Robin frowned at her, "What? No, Regina I would never tell you not to approach Roland anymore. He would probably have my head if I did that," he said with a smirk. Regina looked at him in confusion, so Robin carried on. "Roland got scared when he saw the blood and ran to me to tell me to save you, Regina. He was scared  _f_ _or_  you, not of you."

"Oh…" Regina said and brought her arm closer to her middle, trying to hide it from Robin, but he sat next to her on the bed and took her hand, gently laying it on his lap so he could take a look at her arm.

"It's not as bad as it looks," Regina assured, but Robin shook his head and frowned.

"This isn't the first time isn't it?" Robin asked and Regina felt her anger build again.

"That's none of your business!"

"Well excuse me but it  _is_  my business when this could affect my son!" he sighed. "He cares for you very much Regina, and it would pain me to wake up one day, and have to tell him that his Majesty is gone because she was too careless with her blades," he frowned.

"That's rich of you to use your son like this." Regina scoffed.

"Only because you won't see the truth," Robin looked her in the eye.

"What truth?" She asked, but did she really want to know?

"That I too care about you, Regina." Robin looked at her for a couple more seconds and then looked back at her arm and started to apply a wet cloth on her wound, causing her to moan in pain at the contact.

"What is this anyway?" she ignored his last comment and decided to focus on the pain. That was the only thing that even kept her alive these days, funnily enough.

"Just a mixture I prepared to clean your wound. Roland was right, I  _am_  good at healing 'boo-boos.'" Regina let out a small smile at that, remembering the way Roland said it.

"Is he okay?"

Robin sighed, "he was frightened, but I am sure he'll be fine again once I tell him I 'saved' you and once he can see it with his own eyes in the morning."

She knew what he was doing, trying to persuade her to get out of her room more and spend time with people, probably to change her mind.

"It's because of your son, isn't it?"

"I… I miss him terribly, and my heart hurts a little less when it hurts somewhere else. I don't… I don't  _want_  to die, I wouldn't do that… I have to keep fighting, if not for Henry then for Roland at least,"  _and you_ , she thought.

"Regina… there are other ways to make your heart hurt less," Robin said, finishing to wrap the bandage around her arms and tying it cautiously so it wouldn't fall during the night.

"What's the point anymore?" Regina asked, her voice trembling on the last word and her eyes fixed on the ground.

Robin put the mixture aside and took her chin in his hand, "You deserve to be happy Regina, there are people out there ready to give you their love… don't shut them out, love."

"The only person ready to give me his love is Roland, but he's just a child and doesn't understand all the terrible things I've done… the Charmings are only pretending to care to appease their guilt. I'm a monster and soon enough, Roland will realize that," Regina said with a sad smile, a tear slowly making its way down her cheek.

Robin's heart broke, he wanted her to see everything he could see in heart, the goodness, the love, the beauty… so he acted on impulse and took her face in his hands and gently leaned in to kiss her.

Regina froze when she felt Robin's lips on her own. She hadn't expected him to kiss her, hadn't expected her desire to become true. She felt Robin start to pull away and realized she was still not kissing him back, so she did before he could completely slip away.

Their lips were moving together softly, letting all the untold feelings out. She didn't taste like apple and cinnamon like Robin would have expected, she tasted like wine. The same wine she had been drinking before he broke into her room. But soon enough, the taste started to change and Robin could feel the taste of salt in her kiss. Understanding what was happening, he pulled away slowly, not letting go of her face.

She was crying silently, begging him not to break her heart like so many had done before him. He put his forehead against hers and stroked her cheeks gently.

"Give me a chance Regina… I promise to try and make it hurt less, I promise to be careful with your heart," he whispered.

Regina could have melted on the spot. No one had ever been that gentle with her, no one had ever paid attention to her feelings…

Robin opened his mouth to talk again, but Regina kissed him again instead, letting him know in her own way that she would give him that chance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to go a little bit softer for this one, hope you enjoyed :)

**Author's Note:**

> There you go, I have to admit I changed the ending because I'm weak and just couldn't let my love die for real, let's be honest lol. Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
